Charlie Sheen pens open letter on HIV: Today I claimed back my freedom

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Charlie Sheen has penned an open letter, after revealing he is HIV-positive to thwart blackmailers and tabloid smears.

This letter was originally published on Today. Here it is in full:

Roughly four years ago, I suddenly found myself in the throes of a seismic and debilitating three-day cluster-migraine-like headache.

I was emergently hospitalized with what I believed to be a brain tumor or perhaps some unknown pathology. I was partially correct. Following a battery of endless tests, that included a hideous spinal tap, it was sadly and shockingly revealed to me that I was, in fact, positive for HIV.

The news was a ā€˜mule kickā€™ to my soul. Those impossible words I absorbed and then tried to convince myself, that I was stuck, suspended, or even stranded inside some kind of alternate reality or nightmare, were to the absolute contrary. I was awake. It was trueā€¦ reality.

Under the brilliant and perfect care of Dr. Robert Huizenga as well as ā€˜theā€™ leading infectious disease expert in the known universe, I began a rigorous and intensive treatment program.

Not missing a beat, a med dose, or one shred of guidance, quickly my viral loads became undetectable. Like every other challenge in my life, again, I was victorious and kicking this diseaseā€™s ass. I wish my story had ended there. Unfortunately, for my family and myself, it had only just begun.

The personal disbelief, karmic confusion, shame and anger lead to a temporary yet abysmal decent into profound substance abuse and fathomless drinking. It was a suicide run.

Problem was, Iā€™d forgotten that Iā€™m too tough for such a cowardly departure. Yet, despite this loathsome and horrific odyssey, I was vigilant with my anti-viral program.

My medical team could only shake their heads as each and every blood test returned levels revealing a state of remission. Even though I might have been trying to kill myself, one thing was radically evident; the disease was not.

In and around this perplexing and difficult time, I dazedly chose (or hired) the companionship of unsavory and insipid types.
Charlie Sheen pens open letter on HIV: Today I claimed back my freedom
Regardless of their salt-less reputations, I always lead with condoms and honesty when it came to my condition. Sadly, my truth soon became their treason, as a deluge of blackmail and extortion took center stage in this circus of deceit.

To date, I have paid out countless millions to these desperate charlatans.

Locked in a vacuum of fear, I chose to allow their threats and skullduggery to vastly deplete future assets from my children, while my ā€œsecretā€ sat entombed in their hives of folly. (or so I thought)

News Flash: This ends today. Iā€™m claiming back my freedom. The scales of justice will swiftly and righteously rebalance themselves.

In conclusion, I accept this condition not as a curse or scourge, but rather as an opportunity and a challenge.

An opportunity to help others. A challenge to better myself. Every day, of every month, of every year, countless individuals go to work, man their stations, fulfill their professional obligations with a host of disabilities. Diseases, imperfections, hurdles, detours.

These maladies range from Lupus to Cancer, from paralysis to blindness, from Diabetes to Obesity. ā€œTreated,ā€ HIV is no different.

My partying days are behind me. My philanthropic days are ahead of me.

Ernest Hemingway once wrote:

ā€œCourage is grace under pressure.ā€

Iā€™ve served my time under pressure; I now embrace the courage, and the grace.

Love and Peace,

Charlie Sheen