Users of parenting forum Mumsnet have shared their favourite euphemisms for homosexuality – and some of them are truly bizarre.

The internet discussion board for mothers is notorious for asking politicians about their favourite chocolatey nibble – but one of their recent discussions really takes the biscuit.

One mum asked users to “share favourite bizarre and nice phrases for describing homosexuality”

She wrote: “I was procrastinating from work (which is related to this) and realising I have no idea whether or not people still use all of those euphemisms like ‘a friend of Dorothy’ any more. Do they?”

Here’s 21 of the ways mothers apparently still refer to gay people… without saying ‘gay’.

1. She’s drinking from the furry cup

2. Is he musical?

3. They bang coffins against coffins

4. They don’t need a pestle in their mortar

5. He was light on his feet

6. She wears sensible shoes

7. He has an interest in soft furnishings

8. Are you a friend of Dorothy?

9. He looks like he’d be good to his mother

10. She likes a round of golf

11. Not a fan of the meat feast

12. He’s ballet trained

13. She keeps her nails short

14. He gives too much change for a dollar

15. She keeps her hands in her pockets

16. He dances at the other end of the ballroom

17. He’s as camp as a row of pink tents

18. She’s good friends with Ellen

19. Do you catch the other bus?

20. You must be driving on the other side of the road

21. They’re not from round this way

Or, you could just… you know… say gay.

• Nov 29 2023

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