Man finds long-lost gay brother, after being lied to by homophobic parents for decades
A man has shared the shocking story of how he found his long lost, gay brother.
After years of believing his older brother was missing – or even dead – a man has reunited with his sibling, sharing details of their reunion on Reddit.
The three posts – submitted by throwaway4620048486 – tells of his brother’s “disappearance” when they were younger.
As a boy he had no idea that his brother was in fact gay and in love with the older man.
After many years of not understanding where his brother had gone, the Reddit user found out that his parents had been in contact with his him and had disowned him for being gay.
The story begins with the memory of the last time he saw his brother:
“I’m trying to write this in a way so that no one will be able to research and find out who I am (or my brother is). But it’s the Internet and everyone’s a super sleuth.
“My brother went missing years ago. And when I say ‘missing,’ I mean that his case was declared one of those “creepy unsolved mysteries.” It was on the news.
“I distinctly remember my parents interviewing for the news in our living room. I think I know what happened to him. I was very young when he went missing.
“I barely remember him, but I do remember that I loved him a lot. He would pull me around our block in a wagon. Most kids his age didn’t do that.
“The days before he disappeared, I remember him staying home and babysitting me. I stayed in my room and played Nintendo 64.
“Throughout the day, a guy came over. I remember him. He was older, almost our dad’s age. My brother made me go into my room whenever I heard the doorbell.”
“Later, after the guy left, my brother would ask me not to say anything about the guy. With my brain only being focused on video games and extra dessert at that age, I agreed.
“I didn’t care, nor did I comprehend the gravity of the situation. The day before he disappeared, I remember the older guy coming over. I was in the kitchen and remember looking up and seeing him kiss my brother,” he adds.
“They hugged. They didn’t care that I saw them. The older guy waved at me and I waved back, then I kept watching cartoons.
“I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to my brother whispering outside our front door. ‘Don’t worry, he’s asleep,’ he said. The older guy said something I couldn’t hear.
“Then my brother said something I couldn’t make out, but I made out the words ‘visit them’ or maybe he said ‘visit him’? Either way, I know the word ‘visit’ was in his sentence. The man raised his voice and said no. Then I heard ‘plan’ and ‘city.’ Then I fell asleep again.
“The next morning – the day he disappeared – my parents were at work. My brother was acting very strange. I remember he kept checking the clock.
“In the afternoon, I remember him picking me up and asking me if I wanted to go in the wagon. I was too hooked on Nintendo 64 and said no.
“He almost begged me and I said no again. Then he told me he had to run to our neighbour’s house for something, I don’t even remember what he said. I said okay. He reminded me to not open the door for anyone, only mom and dad.
“I shouted at him “OKAY!” because Super Mario was getting on my fucking nerves and he wasn’t helping. He gave me a hug and told me he loved me and left. He never came back.”
It was only years later, after receiving a mystery gift, that he began to understand what really happened to his brother.
“The memories randomly came flooding back to me earlier, I’m not quite sure why. But it has been taking over my thoughts lately.
“I can’t sleep because I keep thinking about it. I think my brother left with that man and they ran away together. Or maybe something worse happened.
“But I don’t think that’s the case. My freshman year of college, I was part of a sports team that got national recognition.
“I remember my team’s picture was on ESPN and with our university’s name. A few days later, I got mail at my dorm. It was a gift basket.
“I thought it was from my parents, so I didn’t read the card. I threw it away immediately and ate what was in it, but it was nothing but candy. Nerds, jolly ranchers, Tootsie Rolls and Hershey’s Kisses.
“I called my dad and thanked him for the gift basket and he said he didn’t send one, neither did mom. Then I got to thinking: all of those candies were what I used to eat as a kid.
“Literally all I ate for the earliest years of my life were those candies. I tried to find the card, but I couldn’t.
“Then I began to think about how my brother would wheel me in the wagon to the gas station close to our house so I could get candy after dinner, even though it was a punishable-by-death ‘no-no’ from mom.”
As the mystery continued to baffle him, he decided to confront his parents – who he says had “suffered greatly” following his brother’s disappearance.
“Long story short, I got into contact with some detectives that our family has known since my brother went missing. When I started asking questions, they told me that my brother was no longer on any missing persons registry.
“When I asked what that meant, they told me that he was removed per my parent(s) request. I asked my parents – my dad, actually. My dad ignored me.
“My mom told me my brother is alive and okay (‘as far as she knows;). They found my brother years ago – a very, very long time ago – and found out he was living with another man.
“He’s gay, and it disgusted my parents. He tried reaching out to them. They told him they didn’t want anything to do with him and that I didn’t remember him and wouldn’t want to see him.”
Shocked and angry by his parents actions, the brother was devastated to discover what had really happened to his beloved sibling.
“I went ballistic. My parents weren’t fazed by it. They sincerely hate my brother for who he is–for being gay. They kept him a secret from me all my fucking life.
“My brother missed the birth of his nephew, he missed my wedding, graduations, EVERYTHING. just because of my parents. they lied to me.
“I still can’t work up the nerve to call him. the address i have for him is across the fucking country. but he’s alive. my brother is alive.
“my parents let me believe my brother was dead or kidnapped forever, when in reality he just ran away and when he wanted to come back they disowned him i’m fucking crying right now. how could you do that? fuck you, God. fuck you christians and jesus. i don’t even know i’m so fucking – i’m sorry”
Thankfully, with the support of his wife – and a glass of scotch – he finally made contact with his brother after gathering the courage to call his number.
“Me being a creepy ass, the first thing I said after decades of not seeing him and thinking he was dead, I blurted: “I got your number.”
“He asked me who I was and what I wanted. I said, “It’s me.” There was a really long pause. I thought the call had dropped.
“Then I heard him tell someone to turn the radio down and roll the window up. The sound of wind stopped… and then he asked me my name. I told him and he said that I was lying. I told him I got his number from the missing children’s network and detectives. I heard him gasp.
“He asked me what colour shoelaces he wore to a picnic when we were kids, and I remember my mom getting mad at his orange laces with blue shoes. It was the last time we were together as a family.
“I could tell he was crying. The first thing he asked me was: “Where are you?” and I told him I lived a few hours away from home. Without hesitating, he told me, ‘I’m coming.’
Within hours, the brothers were finally reunited.
“He went straight to the airport without any luggage, bought a plane ticket, and flew straight to me. We stayed on the phone with each other the whole time.
“When he was walking through the gate, I knew who he was right away. He is middle-aged; salt and pepper hair, muscular. He looks just like our dad, only better. I know if I told him that, that would make him mad.
“I literally pushed an old lady out of the way and I just hugged him. He’s about two inches taller than me. He was able to pick me up. He was crying, I was crying. I was having a breakdown.
“We went to a bar at the airport. He wouldn’t let me out of his sight. He kept holding onto my arm. He kept telling me how unreal it all was. He apologised to me.
“He kept crying, telling me he felt horrible. I told him to forget everything and tell me about his life.
“He’s married. His husband is a doctor. They live in the Pacific Northwest. They have two children — girls, 12 and 8. He works as a legal consultant and has his own firm.
“He has an amazing life. He told me that he thought I hated him and wanted nothing to do with him. We sat at the bar for hours. Literal hours. I think we sat for about six hours before I begged him to come home and meet my wife.
“We got home, and my wife was a mess. She hugged him and insisted he stay with us. At this point, his husband was going insane and kept calling him.
“He had no idea what was going on. He thought he had eloped or something. It was crazy for a couple of days until everything was explained and out in the open.
“My son and my brother were like two peas in a pod. Honestly, I never wanted children.
“My son was an amazing accident, but I’m not good with kids. I’m always afraid I’m going to break them. But my brother is a pro. Kids love him.”
Since the reunion, the brothers have been inseparable. Their families have met and the Reddit user says he and his wife are planning to move closer to their new family.
However, he says he will never be able to forgive his parents for the pain they have caused.
“He stayed with us for two weeks. And in two weeks, everything about my life changed. His husband and two daughters flew in to stay with us. My brother-in-law and my two nieces. My family. They were my family. They are my family.
“My brother wants my wife and I to move to be closer to him. My wife is on board. I work as a professor at a university and have already started to send out feelers to see if there are any open positions, and I’ve found one that is actually tenured and higher pay.
“I do not plan on forgiving my parents, but my brother still loves them. He went by their house and knocked on the door.
“My father shut the door in his face. My mother gave him a hug and told him to take care of himself. Then she shut him out. I can’t forgive them for that. I have no reason to stay close to them.
“I want to be with my family. I want to make up for all the lost time. It’s 2am right now and I’m drinking a tall glass of scotch and grading papers.
“My beautiful, wonderful, smart, amazing wife is asleep on the couch. She likes to watch me grade papers. My son is asleep in his room cuddled up with all the stuffed animals his uncle brought him.
“And I’m here, so happy, so fulfilled knowing that my family has grown and doubled in size so suddenly. My heart is happy. I am so happy right now, Reddit. I am so happy.”
Read parts one, two and three of the emotional story in full here.
