Bisexuals often deal with crazy statements about their sexuality, from claims of ‘greediness’ to offers of group sex.

It’s tricky to prove you’re not slutty, confused or imaginary all at once – so we’ve made this handy guide of things to avoid saying to bisexuals, just in case you get a burning urge…

1. “Maybe you’re just a bit confused.”

Perhaps confused over why you think we’re confused, but not sexually confused. Is that confusing?

2. “Bisexuality is a myth, though. It’s not real.”

Dear God we’re imaginary! How could we let this happen?

3. “I kissed a girl/boy once in college, but it wasn’t for me.”

That’s nice. Not exactly the same as our experience, but still nice to know.

4. “OMG you’re so greedy!”

Only for Nutella, eaten straight out the jar on a hangover. Not with sexual partners.

5. “Are you just not that fussy?”

Extremely picky, just picking from both fruit bowls.

6. “Are you doing this for attention?”

No, despite what Cher taught me in Clueless.

7. “You don’t fancy me, do you?”

Emm…..well, it’s not that you’re not cute. I just don’t fancy literally everyone.

8. “So….fancy a threesome?”

OK, sometimes some people do. Just not everyone, not all of the time.

9. “You’re definitely gay, you’ve just not accepted it yet.”

Thanks for the diagnosis, Dr Closetwatcher. Still bisexual though.

10. “I could never trust a bisexual, they’d just cheat. Twice the amount of people to worry about.”

Hmmmmm…..

11. “Oh well, it’s nice to experiment.”

Em…..

12. “Girl bisexuals end up straight and boy bisexuals end up gay.”

Sigh. Hopefully we all end up happy.

13. “So….how about that threesome?”

Sigh. We tried.

• Dec 01 2023

16 TV stars you grew up watching who later came out as LGBTQ+