Caitlyn Jenner considered coming out as transgender in death
Caityn Jenner, who publicly transitioned in 2015,Ā has revealed she considered coming out as trans in death.
Talking to Broadly, Jenner discussed her first attempts at transitioning back in the 1980s.
Jenner said she postponed her transition upon falling in love with ex-wife Kris Jenner, the Keeping Up with the Kardashians matriarch.
The former OlympianĀ said that before making the life-changing decision to transition, she thought āa lotā about being buried in womenās clothes.
āI thought about that a lot over the years,āĀ Jenner said, āand it would shock everybody. Screw āem.ā
Jenner came out as trans in 2015 and documented her transition through theĀ E! reality show, I Am Cait. But accepting herself as a trans woman was something she struggled with for years.
After building her career as a successful Olympian,Ā Jenner said she found it difficult to detach from the masculine personality she had created for herself.
In the ā80s, Jenner decided she would transition before turning 40. She underwent plastic surgeryĀ on her nose, began taking cross-sex hormones and had a hair removal procedure for her beard.
She said she had a āsmall B-cupā when she met Kris Jenner. After their marriage and birth of Kendall Jenner, their first child together,Ā Jenner underwent a surgery to get rid of her breasts.
āI canāt even go swimming with my kid,āĀ Jenner said she felt at the time.
- Caitlyn Jenner speaks at the AOL 2016 MAKERS conference at Terranea Resort on February 2, 2016 in Rancho Palos Verdes, California. (Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty)
In 2015, Jenner leftĀ her former identity as Bruce behind and finally embraced Caitlyn andĀ appeared on the cover of Vanity Fairās best-selling issue of the year and received Glamourās Woman of the Year award.
But missteps after her very public transition earned her the ire of the LGBT community.
Jenner upset the LGBT audience with herĀ remarks on marriage equality. Appearing on Ellen DeGeneresā talk show, she said: āIām older than most people in the audience. I kind of like tradition, and itās always been a man and a woman. Iām thinking, āI donāt quite get it.’ā
Furthermore, her status as a celeb and white rich woman didnāt sit well with trans activists, who thought Jenner was in no position to understand the struggles of poor trans people of colour, who suffer more abuse and experience more discrimination than others.
Jenner is aware of that disconnect: āAlong the way, did I make mistakes? Absolutely,ā Jenner told Broadly.
āBut I never did it maliciously. I just didnāt know, you know? And I really didnāt realise how critical the community was going to be.ā
Members of the LGBT community also took an issue with Jennerās controversial political endorsements. In 2016, Jenner, a Republican, supported Ted Cruz and eventually voted for Donald TrumpĀ in the presidential election.
āTrump seems to be very much for women. He seems very much behind the LGBT community because of what happened in North Carolina with the bathroom issue,ā she told StatĀ at the time.
In the run-up to the election in 2016, Trump criticised North Carolinaās bathroom bill, which stated that people should use public bathroom according to their ābiological gender,ā thus discriminating against trans and nonbinary individuals. The then-candidate said people should use any bathrooms “they feel [are] appropriate.” HeĀ then backtracked his statement.
āHe backed the LGBT community. But in Trumpās case, thereās a lot more unknowns,ā she added.
- Donald Trump holds an LGBT rainbow flag during a campaign rally at the Bank of Colorado Arena on the campus of University of Northern Colorado October 30, 2016 in Greeley, Colorado. (Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty)
Jenner has sinceĀ changed her tune and now says Trump āhas been, for all LGBT issues, the worst president we have ever had,ā and says she could not support him for re-election.
āI want him to know politically I am disappointed, obviously. I donāt want our community to go backwards,ā she said, ājust leave us alone, thatās all we want. Then maybe later down the line, we can get somebody a little better.ā
The Republican party is not known to be a beacon of support for LGBTQ rights. Several Republican states have passed or attempted to pass discriminatory laws, such as exclusionary bathroom bills.
Jenner said she would rather work to change the partyās stand on LGBT issues from within.
“The Republicans need the most work when it comes to our issues, I get that. I would rather work from the inside,ā she said.
āIām not the type of person who is going to stand on a street corner with a sign and jump up and down. No, Iām going to go have dinner with these people.ā
Jenner flew to Washington for Trumpās inauguration and met with Vice President Mike Pence, whom she calls the āreal enemy.ā She recalled telling him she was a Christian and a Conservative, but also a trans woman.
When asked if she would ever vote Democrat, Jenner said she would have to look into it.
āI donāt vote parties, I vote the person,ā Jenner said.