38 thoughts I had watching Drag Race All Stars 8, episode 3: ‘Not my favourite twist, but it’ll do’

The remaining ten queens of Drag Race All Stars 8 are tasked with design bonanza, the Supermarket Ball – but did the right queen get the chop?

We’re well and truly back into All Stars season, baby. Monica Beverly Hillz and Naysha Lopez have already entered the Fame Games, and by the end of episode three’s ball challenge, one more queen joins them, decided for the first time this season by the challenge winner, rather than the lip sync assassin

More alliance juice is spilt, Lala Ri deals with the PTSD of a design challenge after season 13’s gift-bag-gate and Jojo Siwa is a guest judge, which is a sentence that no one else has probably ever said.

Here are 38 thoughts I had watching All Stars 8, episode three.

• Naysha Lopez has exited the competition for a third time. To be eliminated on three episodes of Drag Race when you’ve only appeared on five is a talent, actually.
• I’ll be honest, I still don’t know how I feel about this cast. Every time I see Mrs Kasha Davis it’s a jumpscare.
• Jimbo picked Naysha based on ‘track record’, which I feel is fair but I doubt Miss Lopez feels that way.
• Kahanna can’t open the lipstick-voting box but ‘thank god she’s pretty’. And then she finds out there were three votes for her, and she’s pressed. These are the biggest voting splits this early in an All Stars, surely? More violence, now.
• The girls re-enter the werk room and Lala is making me pee with her confessionals this season. Talking about falling through her chair. A few more, Lala, and I might forgive you for the bag look. Might.

• The pot is now $30,000 for a lip sync victory, if one of these girls decides to win a lip sync.
• I have absolutely nothing to add about the discussion of sex swings.
• They are really running out of themes for the Ball challenges, aren’t they. I feel like the Supermarket Ball – this week’s maxi-challenge – just isn’t that c**ty.
• Dairy Queen, Frootie Patootie and Supermarket Supermodel are the runway categories for the ball
• These Pit Crew members have been in the gym, and then the very small pants store, and then rolled around in a pit of oil. I, for one, could not be more thankful. Maybe I have some more thoughts on sex swings now.
• The All Stars 8 girlies get their unconventional materials and Mrs Kasha Davis immediately sets my alarm bells ringing by saying she doesn’t sew because she’s “not Amish and has good credit”. It’s funny, but it alarms me that the editors have chosen to highlight that. Mrs Kasha Davis is about to become a housewife again.
• If I was Lala, I would have the fear of this challenge. That bag look lives rent-free. Unfortunately. But, she learnt how to sew, which is giving personal development.
• Kandy is nervous and Lala is nervous. The season 13 girls are nervous. I’d be nervous.
• Heidi and Lala are trying to discuss their alliance which I can’t wait to see come into play. Heidi is also allied with Jimbo and Kandy, for those counting – that’s 2/5s of the cast. Daenaerys slay!

• Why is Jaymes wearing a harness? All Stars 8 is weird.
• Alexis Michelle might be the horniest member of a Drag Race cast, ever. Good for her.
• Darienne hasn’t had a single confessional yet. Weird.
• RuPaul loves Jimbo. Surprised we didn’t see her locked up in the disco room of RuPaul’s AD tour.
• Darienne’s walkthrough is funny, Alexis talks about her season nine fashions and the editors are shady BOOTS for flashing up just most of her runways, Jessica worries about her drag compares to the new generation. But she is legendary.
• Beginning to realise that RuPaul has just formulated a cast of people she finds funny. Whether they are funny is another question.
• Why is RuPaul making Heidi cry already? What relevance does someone’s grandma have to a s Supermarket ball Challenge? I do get the need for emotional depth, but RuPaul’s Trauma Exploitation Race is back.
• Lala is being FUNNY! If it quack like a duck, it’s a pitbull. OK!

• Jojo Siwa is the guest judge and I swear she’s literally 12. So rich, though. So rich.
• There are 30 looks pumping this main stage so I simply do not have enough thoughts. I’ll comment on the gags and the flopperinis but middle of the road queens – you get nothing.
• On that note, Jimbo, Kahanna and Jaymes’s Dairy Queen looks are all fun and different and expensive. Jaymes doesn’t scream ‘dairy’ though. Alexis is a cow, Jessica is a Froot Loops bowl, drag is so stupid. Not sure how Kasha’s runway screams ‘dairy’, but Heidi’s a cute sexy milkmaid.
• Frootie Patootie is here and Jimbo has attended the Luxx Noir London school of sycophancy by plastering Ru’s face on her dress. LOVE Kahanna’s banana look, Jaymes’s lemon corset is giving simple, Alexis looks like Violet Beauregarde and Lala’s latex caramel apple looks like a hot dog with mustard. Heidi’s strawberry pantaloons are cute.
• Now here comes the Supermarket Supermodel, which these girlies made themselves. Kandy, what is that. Alexis, what is that. Darienne, what is that. Lala’s look is simple but passable!
• Jessica is munching – yes, it’s a corset with flowers glued to it, but it looks great.
• Kasha Davis looks like a birthday clown did acid and then threw up, and the Kasha swam in it.
• Heidi!!! Slay.

• Bizarre to see Jojo Siwa giving Jimbo critiques. I’m also absolutely gagged that Heidi and Kahanna were deemed safe!
• Ts Madison to Kasha Davis: “This I hate!” The new Nicki Minaj.
• Darienne and Kasha are in the bottom – and I really do feel like Kasha’s weird speech about being just ‘glad to be there’ might have been a kiss of death for her, despite Darienne also being in the bottom.
• Jessica wins, which means we might be about to see an All Stars 8 cast member win a lip sync! Although, the LSA is Ra’Jah O’Hara with a stacked title card so… we’ll see.
• Jessica has stolen this lip sync, I’ll be honest. Those coconuts! Must have borrowed Yara’s All Stars 6 breastplate. Ra’Jah, by contrast, has no coconuts.
• I keep forgetting about the Fame Games. It’s not my favourite twist, but it’ll do. Ra’Jah’s reaction to it is funny.
• Kasha gets the chop! What the hell! Kandy nodding in the back is shady boots, and Kasha’s actual exit is very sad.
• Why is everyone so nice to each other when they’re eliminated? I want anger and reality TV. Give us ‘Ugh, Jesus, gross.’

All Stars 8, episode three is available to stream now on WoW Presents Plus.

• Nov 29 2023

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