35 thoughts I had watching Drag Race season 16, episode 9: ‘She’s definitely not topping’

RuPaul’s Drag Race season 16, episode 9, chops a leading queen in a gagworthy lipsync following the third design challenge of the season.

Following a very emotional lipsync between besties Xunami and Morphine, the queens of season 16 are challenged with getting their goth on in a See You Next Wednesday inspired runway that leaves several of the girls shook.

It’s business as usual for Drag Race episode 9 Mother Sapphira as she does yet more charity work, Plane (shockingly) declines to give her immunity potion to someone else (again) and Nymphia pretends not to know what she’s doing.

Here are 35 thoughts I had watch RuPaul’s Drag Race, season 16, episode 9.

• Half the cast has now sashayed away, meaning only eight queens remain after Xunami’s elimination – time flies when you’re under immense psychological pressure, hey.
  
• The girls all seem genuinely upset to have seen Xunami go – particularly Morphine, who sent her best friend home. It’s sad! It really is.
  
• It’s suddenly turned into Mhi’ya Iman Le’Paige’s Drag Race in episode 9, and reader, I. Am. Living!
  
• So Aircraft Annie won last week – and in her confessional, Mhi’ya says what a lot of us are thinking; Sapphira should have won!
  
• The next day, Mhi’ya continues her reign of terror by telling Plane she deserves Miss C*nt-geniality. LOVE this Mhi’ya.
  
• The queens have to do a spit take challenge which is very wet and very funny.
  
• I love the way Sapphira walks, like that is my uncle.
  
• It’s the third design challenge of the season! The girls have to create a goth inspired look using only black, grey and white fabric. I am suddenly worried for Mhi’ya, who is so “aggravated” that her necklace pops off.

• Straight up, Morphine, Mhi’ya and Plasma do NOT look thrilled.
  
• Three design challenges is a gag, and kiiiiiiind of smells a bit of production riggory if I’m honest, because they know that Q and Nymphia are gonna eat.
  
• Season three had a design challenge every other week, though.
  
• Sapphira mixing up Catherine and Scarlet O’Hara – with Dawn asking if she means Asia – is funny.
  
• Dawn is gagging for this win, which invariably means she won’t get it! That’s what happens with Drag Race. If you say it out loud, it won’t happen.
  
• It’s episode 743 of Nymphia pretending that she doesn’t know what she’s doing. It’s getting a little bit old I fear. Please don’t come for me, internet. She’s going to win anyway.
  
• Q is literally interviewing the entire cast on their looks. You are not Oprah!
  
• Plasma is getting a lot of screen time. I’ll be gagged if the statistical front runner goes home, because she’s definitely not topping. We’re so similar.
  
• Sapphira is literally mother. She gives Plasmoid some much-needed TLC, a hug and a pep tall that made me well up watching it.
  
• Mhi’ya is also in trouble and Mother Sapphira goes to help her too. If she doesn’t win, this is Miss Congeniality.

• The next day, Mhi’ya is being awfully confident for someone who didn’t make their own garment!
  
• It’s so frustrating that Plane is such a c*nt, but so good at drag. Clock the exposed corset, though.
  
• Mhi’ya’s dress is very well made. Sorry, Sapphira’s dress that Mhi’ya is wearing is very well made.
  
• Dawn munched this. I love!
  
• Morphine is giving safe. Good job, Morphinsterina.
  
• Plasma’s look is not the best. Hope the lip sync is a Patti LuPone number!
  
• Sapphira sells her garments like no one else. She literally could walk out there in a diaper and they would eat her up.
  
• It’s episode 743 of Nymphia pretending that she doesn’t know what she’s doing and then absolutely dominating the challenge.
  
• Q, this is not goth. It’s a stunning garment, but I think this is going to be one of those moments where the judges go: ‘It wasn’t the brief – but we loved it!’.

• Ru should just stop asking Plane if she wants to use her immunity potion. Obviously, she doesn’t.
  
• Michelle clocks Mhi’ya’s tea of Sapphira making her entire dress. And Mhi’ya just lies to Michelle’s face and says she did most of it. I live.
  
• Dawn’s garment is held up by fishing line? That’s an engineer, mawma.
  
• I really don’t know who the win is going to, because the judges gag over Q’s not goth garment – but I’m fairly sure that Plasma and Mhi’ya will be lip syncing.
  
• So Q wins and I’m ever so frustrated for Dawn. I think the evil little elf deserved it. Plasmoid and Mhi’ya are lipsyncing, as I so predicted. Ever so concerned for Plasma, even though she’s got two wins.
  
• I can’t believe we live in a world where a lipsync song on Drag Race is the sped-up, TikTok version.
  
• Mhi’ya doing a Sasha Velour wig reveal and doing flips in a gown? I might have to stan.
  
• Plasma loses – not a frontrunner being sent to the house… Why is her exit quote a seven page long monologue, though?

RuPaul’s Drag Race season 16 continues on Friday on MTV in the US and on Saturday on WOW Presents Plus internationally. You can read last week’s recap here.

• Nov 29 2023

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