I’m A Celeb’s Rev Richard Coles opens up about husband’s tragic death

I’m a Celebrity camper Richard Coles has opened up about his husband’s death, five years ago.

The former Communards instrumentalist shared his emotional grief, during Tuesday’s (26 November) episode of the ITV reality show. “I miss him,” he said. “He left a massive hole in my life and I’m living my life around that loss.”

David Oldham, a fellow Anglican priest who took Coles’ surname, died in 2019 just days before Christmas after a battle with liver disease. He was 43.

Coles has discussed the hardship of losing a loved one on numerous occasions, including in his book, The Madness of Grief: A Memoir of Love and Loss, in which he talked about his partner’s battle with alcohol addiction.

“It was really, really tough to see somebody you love destroy himself,” he wrote. “It is like someone is drowning and you throw them a life belt, but they are just not taking [it]. I [tried] everything I could think of to help him stop drinking, and in fairness to him he did try, but it was too much for him.”

Coles was asked by fellow campmate GK Barry whether he found it difficult being gay and a vicar.

“No, not at all,” he replied. “I’ve never given it a moment’s twinge of anxiety over whether God thought it was all right or not. Whether other people thought it was all right, well I’m happy to have that argument.”

The retired clergyman went on to say he was not the first gay vicar. “Sometimes I look at documents from the early Church, or the Church of the Middle Ages, and I just think: so gay.”

While Coles originally claimed his relationship with David was platonic – Church of England’s rules required the couple to be celibate – he later admitted to The Times that this was not true and they lied to avoid being drummed out of the Church.

When asked whether this had affected him, Coles responded: “It wears off pretty quickly… I mean, I felt sometimes I was in the Resistance and they were the Gestapo. I’m overstating it but what I did feel is that they had no moral cause. I didn’t feel I had a moral obligation at all.”

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